Drunk History travels to Boston, where another round of narrators give their drunk take on important events in history. Jen Kirkman lets us in on the story of Mary Dyer, while a couple shares their thoughts on who robbed the Gardner Museum. Last but not least, Chris Romano shares a story that might be from his past.
Drunk History starring Derek Waters airs on Comedy Central Tuesdays at 9 p.m. ET.
Jen Kirkman Talks Mary Dyer
Mary Dyer (Winona Ryder) and her husband were Quakers. The Puritans (led by Michael Cera) were dead set in their ideas about God and the Holy Spirit. But Mary disagreed and had her own thoughts. The Puritans didn’t like it, so Mary was banished from Massachusetts. Mary came back to town and asked for religious tolerance. But the Puritans weren’t having it, so they decided to hang her. Mary is taken to the gallows, but they give her the choice to leave once again, and she takes the offer. But once again Mary goes back to Massachusetts, and once again, she’s taken to the gallows. But instead of offering her the option to leave again, Mary is killed. By now I’ve begun to grow a little tired of the repetitiveness of the setup, but I actually found myself laughing through this segment, mostly due to Ryder’s lip syncing, which was hilariously matched with Cera’s.
Erin and Michael Explain How the Gardner Museum Was Robbed
Isabella Stewart Gardner was a rebel during her time. She wore a headband when no one wore a headband. She also built a museum. In 1990, two guys dressed as police officers tricked their way into the museum and tied up the Security guards. They wanted to steal the artwork, but it was too secure to the wall, so they began to panic and cut out the paintings from the frames and take it. The FBI (Jason Ritter) comes in, but all the leads are dead ends, which never happened in the Art Theft Situation office. The joke is on the robbers, because they never made it to the Fourth floor, where the really expensive stuff was. This was one of the rare times where I felt the narration really enhanced the lip syncing, instead of the other way around.
Chris Romano Explains Johnny Cool
Johnny Cool (Nick Offerman), the most prolific arsonist in New England’s history. He also happens to be Chris Romano’s father. Well, he is according to Chris. He was also part of a team called The Gold Dust Twins. The Twins’ next job was to burn down one of the biggest constructions in New England. The Guy (Bob Odenkirk) has put too much money into the hotel, which is why he wants it destroyed. Johnny Cool agrees to do the job, and goes to visit the building as it burns. Johnny was arrested in 1979 for counterfeiting, but he also admitted to being an arsonist. Of course, if you are as talented as Johnny, you want to brag about it. The police give him an offer to go straight, but only if he rats out his partners. Johnny takes the deal because he knew his wife was pregnant with Chris. The Cools are placed in Witness Protection, though it seems as if Johnny still has the desire to burn things. The best thing about this segment was the chance to see Connie Britton do some comedy, which I’ve missed since her time on Spin City.
“We’re from England but we have our own thing going on.”